Thought my life was opening up... I really did. So I took a risky step forward into the unknown to embrace it... and then KABLOOEY! ... Everything blew up in my face. The whole damn thing imploded, just like that. Reduced to shell-shocked rubble. All the energy that had gone into building it up - for naught, wasted. All the hopes, the fantasies of what might be - foolishness, mockery.
Reading this book right now about learning to live "consciously," and the author promises how life will open up with new creativity and aliveness when you get it down. And I just want to say, "Fuck that! Am I really supposed to open up to such foolish, narcissistic hopes again? How long have I been on this train of life?"
Damn long, that's how long.
